A Life Tip from Sophia

Daughter Sophia has discovered that if you narrate everything you do in a quiet (and somewhat sad) fake British accent, it makes your life sound like a documentary . . . no matter what you happen to be doing.

“Bringing the laundry basket upstairs, Sophia notices that her mother looks nauseated and a bit tired. Was it the long homeschool day? She wasn’t sure”

Try it and your mundane chores will attain instant gravitas :-).

Limitations: Accepting

Ugh. It's so frustrating to be "losing" all of this Spring to the nausea (and, turns out, severe anemia - but I'm getting weekly IV iron to fix that all up). It's too easy to set myself up for this frustration by the long habit of full mental to-do lists, and the bar is so stinkin' low these days.

Little projects are happening. I'm not going to be able to do a whole garden this year. For one thing, I never started tomato seeds. I'll just plant what I can, and let the other beds have a fallow year, or aim for doing better at planting in July/August for winter crops than I always do. Thankfully the peas are coming up relatively well, as we always really enjoy snow/snap peas and I'd hate for the family to miss that. And the herbs are amazing again this year. I had a day where I needed to stay outside all day to babysit the goats, and I was able to sit on the sides of the garden beds (thank heaven for raised beds) and weed them all, so they look empty but nice.

The kitchen job is perking along as well. When I feel up to it, I can sometimes get in an hour or so of sanding. We're sanding off the textured paint on one wall of the kitchen where it needs to be smooth for our goal paint look. Oh I do love to watch it go. Almost as thrilling as when I scraped the popcorn off the bedroom ceiling!

Sadly, a setback. I've not finished waxing the cupboards yet, although that too is making progress, and the tops of all the cupboards have a dark edge that goes down about 3/4 inch. At first I thought The Patriarch had been less than careful while prepping the ceiling for paint (sorry sweetie) but no, looks like I didn't get all the greasiness when I prepped the top of the cupboards and it took awhile to seep through. What a mess! I'm kind of ignoring it a bit while I consider what to do. I used a strong degreaser and really thought I'd gotten it all.

This is standardized testing time of year, and my children take two separate sorts of tests. Gareth and Tarquin are finished with their proctored-online test, Clara did the PSAT earlier (which counts in our state for standardized testing for the year), and I have yet to administer an IOWA for Araminta and Lucinda. Nigel is finished with his first year of university - so exciting that he'll be a senior next year. And Sophia just has a couple of weeks left before her graduation from homeschool high school and receiving her AA.

So yes, everything is super busy. But there are so many days where driving to pick Sophia up and doing some math and reading with Tarquin, plus answering questions/mini lessons with the others are the only things I do, and that feels horrible. It feels like there's a big mountain of undone tasks that are sliding inch by inch toward smooshing us. People are so kind and ask all the time if there's anything they can do to help, but the stuff that weighs on my mind is just stuff I should have done long ago that would make the tough times (like now) easier, and I didn't. Impossible to say, "Why yes, thanks for asking, would you mind decluttering the family room?" "Sure, thanks for offering. Here's a two foot stack of paperwork. Probably most of it doesn't need to be kept".

So the trick is to just be OK with what I can do. What else is there? The Zofran does help somewhat, like a volume knob being turned down a bit. I can still "hear the music" but it's not as loud. I've been told by others with this lymphoma that in full remission, the nausea goes away, so there is a possible end to that. I have to have real reliance that not only is there a purpose in my life for this, but a purpose for each of my family, as well. And I do feel that in general, deeply, but the working-out-my-faith part comes in handling the daily frustration of just not getting anything done!

When I Back Out of Our Driveway

I must first move a sword, shoo the ducks from the gate, and make sure that little playing people are lined up on the grass where I can keep my eyes on them as I back up the van. I chuckle at the "I love you dady" written in the dust in the back of the van, thinking "that's gonna be mixed feelings when he sees that".

See what I mean? So incredibly blessed.

Thoughts on Annie Sloan, Disneyland, and my own wee Hameau de la Reine

I’m such a hypocrite. What I’ve really disliked about this house, which embodies 1979, the year it was built, is the over-the-top artificiality of that era. For example, our baseboards are made of chipboard with a plastic contact-paper type covering imprinted to look like . . . wait for it . . . wood. Because that is so much better than the old, outdated practice of using wood baseboards, right? Everything that could possibly be fake is. It was the era of Cool Whip, polyester clothing, and just a couple of years before the advent of Chicken McNuggets.

Which kind of leaves the owner of one of these homes, the 1970’s split level, with a decorating dilemma. What does authenticity look like? Maybe just . . . harvest gold and “patchwork” kitchen carpet and a crochet blender cover.

Well, not gonna do it. So I’m embracing the hypocrisy, and have been working on turning my kitchen into a French country bistro look. I’ve been in old European kitchens, so yes I do know that this is the Disney version. And Annie Sloan is helping! It hadn’t occurred to me that our cupboards could be rescued, but she created her wonderful chalk paint that requires no sanding, no primer, and a quart stretches forever. Our cabinetry was covered in a coat of glossy poly, so the thought of prepping all that was just too daunting. I’m midway in the project now, but the cabinets are looking so dreamy! There will be a reveal in the future . . . I just wanted to ‘fess up.

So maybe Marie Antoinette didn’t really say “let them eat cake”, but I intend to, as happy creations come out of my own little “Hameau de la Reine”. Vive la make-believe!

Now That It Feels Like Spring

Selkie is thinking she’s a baby again. Nigel made the mistake of bending over to pick something up. Good thing it wasn’t Tarquin!

If You've Followed "The Dream House"

We've come to the last post about the dream house. Coming back from the orthodontist today, we drove past it for the last time, and saw a for sale sign, so I was able to look up the listing online to see what they'd done inside. So sad. After clear cutting all of the beautiful old nut and fruit trees and lovely growth that gave the property all the charm, whoever was remodeling it did a big ol' cookie cutter throughout. Gray carpet, "neutral" walls, granite counters . . . looks like a subdivision home anywhere. Interchangeable with any circa 2001 house. Now, if you adore 2001 home styles, great! You are likely a super happy house hunter, since there are so many on the market. But this was a 1944 charming farmhouse that had unfortunately been 1970'ized, and longed to return to 1944.

The cool, shady back covered area which would be such a perfect place for children to play outside in the rain or too-direct sun was walled in to make a garage so the former garage could be "RV parking". Ugh.

The upside is that I've no angst about it going up for sale, or longing for those beautiful fruit and nut trees and glorious 1.66 acres, since the remodel turned it into a bland lawn space. It's been a long road, but it's over. Just thought I'd like to write the ending out here, since the story had had the beginning on this blog as well.

Clara’s Sixteenth Birthday Trip

We have a family tradition here, begun with Sophia, that when a daughter turns sixteen, there is a trip to Portland for a long weekend. The fixed parts of the trip are a visit to The Perfume House to choose a signature scent, and my sister hanging out with us all weekend. Beyond that, the daughter in question chooses the activities.

Clara adores fashion, and has been our chef and baker since Sophia began college classes, so her trip centered around fashion and food. Conveniently enough, since Portland is a mecca for both.

We headed out on a Friday morning

in the driving rain just after breakfast and arrived for lunch downtown. We ended up having some mediocre sushi and looked at shoes at Nordstrom Rack a bit before meeting up with my sister. She manages a wonderful apartment building downtown and she’d set up a vacancy for a little vacation spot, as well as having stopped by Crave Bakeshop to pick up cake pops.

 

 

Off to the Perfume House

There is a wonderful woman there, who helped us find Sophia’s signature scent as well. Each time we go, we regret not having asked her name! She is just fabulous; taking us on a tour of fragrances, educating each daughter’s nose, and helping her to narrow in on what it is she likes and dislikes in a scent. The Perfume House is “the world’s largest collection of real fragrances” and is such a treasure. The original owner, an official “nose”, assisted me 22 years ago in finding a signature scent.

  

Sister and I functioned as extra arm space for testing various scents and notes for Clara, and we finally left, smelling delicious and feeling as though we’d been in a magical country for hours. Clara had found a scent that she loved, although we have to laugh at the somewhat mortifying name of it: “Cute Blue” by Mandarina Duck. Her runner up perfume was “Fairy Dance” so that was just as bad!

We then shopped vintage and thrift stores up Hawthorne Street and Clara bought a fun charm bracelet watch. Hungry, we decided to re-visit a Thai spot we’d hit on Sophia’s birthday trip. Great decision. Food was wonderful and reasonably priced, and decor had been bumped up since our last visit.

Salad

 

After dinner, we shopped for some nail polish and headed back to the apartment for mani/pedis:

 

Up bright the next morning for our main fashion day. Clara was excited to head toward the inspiration offered along Alberta and Mississippi Streets and their more indie fashion spots, so that was where we were headed. But first, to a boulangerie for breakfast. These are from the amazing St. Honoré Bakery.

I will add the disclaimer that we did have something healthy prior to leaving the apartment! Thus fortified, we headed off to be inspired by fashion.

 

We dipped into a fascinating craft store and were mesmerized by the stamp collection:   

Salt and Straw, an artisanal ice cream shop is oh so conveniently located for when energy flags:

Clara had Sea Salt with Caramel Ribbons and sister and I had Pear with Blue Cheese. The latter flavor sounds a bit bizarre but was just heavenly.

After yet more shopping, we were ready for lunch. Podnah’s Pit Barbeque makes many lists of “don’t miss while in Portland”, and was nearby, so that’s where we headed. Bananagrams was just the ticket for waiting for our order:

Which was another delicious meal. I have to agree with reviewers – great food.

 

When we ran out of fashion, we talked Clara into a “quick” trip to Title Wave. This is where Multnomah County sells their used library books. The sun popped out for a moment as we arrived:

After awhile there, we abandoned our original plan of hitting a food cart for dinner (still being stuffed) and opted instead to do a salad and leftovers back at the apartment . . .

Clara posing with her new cell phone ;-)

      . . . before heading out for contra dancing. My sister really stepped in where I couldn’t, as there were many moments that I had to sit on this trip. Her gift of energy was so appreciated. I worked on some handsewing for a Nisqually dress for Clara while I watched, and tapped my foot, and felt like Mrs. Bennet! Clara had a very good time contra dancing and found it similar enough to what she does at Nisqually to catch on quickly, and she never lacked for a partner.

We finally left at 10:30, when an overly enthusiastic gentleman spun Clara so that her feet were off the ground to his knee level, then crunched down on her toe as she hit the ground!

The next morning after a healthy bit, we made the really quite unavoidable decision to return to St. Honoré, then headed downtown for more mainstream fashion. Went to Nordstrom Rack, then across to Pioneer Place, which also includes a huge Forever 21 and H & M.

Don’t need pictures of this . . . you’ve been mall shopping dear reader, right?

Back to the apartment to change, then another very anticipated highlight of our trip. Clara had chosen the type of cuisine she’d like to have for a special dinner out, and had chosen French. We were so privileged to eat at Little Bird Bistro. Chef Gabriel Rucker was the 2011 winner of the James Beard Rising Star Chef Award for the best chef aged 30 or younger and Little Bird is his second Portland restaurant.

We had decided beforehand that we’d feel uncomfortable bringing the big camera in, and chose to just concentrate on the food. We shared an appetizer of Goat Cheese Creamed Kale, and sister had a salad. Clara ordered “Poussin Au Vin, fried leg, bacon & mushroom pot pie”, my sister ordered “Grilled Trout, clam & bacon stew, soft boiled egg”, and I had “Roasted Veal Breast, buttermilk spaetzle, mushroom ragout, foie gras”. But there is no way that words will tell you how delicious this food was. My sister, about fifteen minutes into dinner, said, “You know how when you eat some really good food, you might say, ‘mmmmm’ with the first few bites? I just realized that I’m over halfway done with this and I’m still saying, ‘mmmmmm’ with every single bite!”  My veal was in a perfect, melting square which sat atop the spaetzle, ragout, and foie gras for the most perfect unctuous, complicated combination of flavors. Sigh.

After Little Bird, we went back to the apartment to do henna tattoos. I’d bought a different brand than our usual, finding one at JoAnn’s before leaving. I mention this because it was a disaster. The instructions were different from the kits we’d used before, and it turned out so runny that it would only make huge thick lines. I started to draw designs on Clara but got banned and sister rescued the whole thing.

The next morning was Monday, and we were all heading out, but after we packed the cars, we decided to get in one more stop with my sister. We’d been talking all weekend about stopping at Cacao for Clara to have an amazing cup of hot chocolate.

After which, we said a very sad goodbye to my sister. Clara and I went home via the Portland IKEA and she got in one last little shopping bit, finding a dress at a Dress Barn next door to IKEA. We had lovely weather on our drive home, and as always when I leave, the Patriarch had the place spotless on our return.

It was wonderful to spend this special vacation with such an amazing young woman!